Crush...Yiff...Destroy!

Goofy · Vociferator Joined: 18 Mar 2005 Posts: 311

This is probably old news, but I decided to post this since there's been a lot of sculptures lately in the AA.

Here's one of the more notorious furry sculptures on the web: UNICORN ORGY. Recently, it surfaced on a few Worst-of-the-Web-ish sites. What separates this from the usual fan-wanks is this was inspired by a dream the creator had. The dream had such an impact on him that he wrote it in the form of a nonsensical story called LOLA and then proceeded to analyse the shit out of it. The catch: HE'S STARK-RAVING, MASTURBATING-IN-HIS-OWN-FAECES INSANE

He created four different characters which somehow interlock to form an orgy. I guess it's like a perverted version of Voltron. There's two Unicorns; one of each gender. So, fuck you, Noah! There's also some kind of coyote-goat hybrid. I didn't know coyotes and goats had such intimate relations, nor did I know they sprouted such deformed offspring. The author says it represents the give-and-take duality of man. Or something. He was probably drunk on Listerine when he came up with the idea.

Finally, there's a dryad who gives Mr Coyote-Goat a bit o' the ol' blowjob.

While fingering herself.

Oh, well, I guess a virgin goddess can join an orgy if she wants to... she's only putting her own fingers in, and Clinton showed us that mouths, fingers, vibrators, cigars, and presidential aides don't count.

Oh, sorry, was that cynical?

Well, if the whole sculpturing things doesn't work out, at least he can get a job writing shitty jokes for Letterman.

Here's his VCL archive.

And although he denies using terms like 'beastiality' and 'furry', here's a page on Animal Sexuality (i.e. beastiality and furry).

So anybody know this Chris Wayan guy? Is he as insane as his dreams and stories make him out to be?

Captain Cowgirl · Needs to get out more Joined: 27 May 2005 Posts: 1091

Hahahahahaha ok ok ok
I GUESS YOU COULD CALL THESE HORNY HORSES (Get it? Horny?) UNIPORN STARS! (geddit? huh?)

TheBobSays · Venter Joined: 19 Jun 2005 Posts: 236

Wooo. I have nothing to follow those puns.

Loving the creepy expressions, and how it took him years. Like an epic train wreck in slow motion. The neck trauma on that "Mare in heat" still makes me wince.

baserock love · Vociferator Joined: 04 Dec 2004 Posts: 685

I just browsed through his site. Well i tried to, i didn't make it far past the start page. WTF is wrong with these people? We know his name so it must be on there, and he's putting shit like this up? Is his whole family dead? No friends?! How could someone want to make something like this common knowledge and traceable too him?! Yikes.

Also, they should do background checks before selling art supplies.

TheBobSays · Venter Joined: 19 Jun 2005 Posts: 236

I just browsed through his site. Well i tried to, i didn't make it far past the start page. WTF is wrong with these people? We know his name so it must be on there, and he's putting shit like this up? Is his whole family dead? No friends?! How could someone want to make something like this common knowledge and traceable too him?! Yikes.

Also, they should do background checks before selling art supplies.

Agreed on the background check.

I'll never understand these attention whores. At first, I thought, "Well, maybe he has a common name. I have a friend who doesn't hide behind a pseudonym because Chris Hunter is such a common name, Google is still a needle in a haystack." But no, he's unique. And has a PO box. Of course, he owns the site, and whois (Must enter happy number) backs it up.

Most likely, most of his family do not have the computer skills to make the connection (I swear, Google is like Tivo for the internet), and even so, it's likely they've been supportive of that which we're all cringing at. At the bottom of the orgy page (Such a quick term!) there's a hint of "I grew up solitary, in an atheist family ignorant of conventional religion..."

Really, there's a whole thick smog of self-importance on the site. It's only his dreams, and yet, it's a world dream bank? "Hello, I'd like to deposit the dream I had last friday involving zombies, hitchhiking, the Matrix, and fursuits, and withdraw my childhood nightmare which involved Sesame Street and Adam West-esque Batman." The cataloging and organization is depressingly impressive, and you just have to pause to reflect on how much time was spent on an entire site one person dedicated to their own brain farts.

And not a single page dedicated to 'Here's pictures of my pet cat.' A pity.

EFudd · Prattler Joined: 12 May 2005 Posts: 140

Hahahahahaha ok ok ok
I GUESS YOU COULD CALL THESE HORNY HORSES (Get it? Horny?) UNIPORN STARS! (geddit? huh?)

You could, then again a strategically placed letter "r" in something like, "My little Pornies". I dunno, ever since Heroinni posted that pic of "Krieg" its been funny to bash the 20-something year old series.

Somebody help add to this, what else could they be called.

Trista · Prattler Joined: 30 May 2005 Posts: 156

Clinton showed us that mouths, fingers, vibrators, cigars, and presidential aides don't count.

Clinton Jobs!