Crush...Yiff...Destroy!

GoManVanGogh · Vociferator Joined: 18 Nov 2003 Posts: 659

Out of sheer, morbid curiosity, I just visited the Zeta Creations website.

For those of you who don't know, Zeta Creations is a company that manufactures dildoes.....

Which I have no problem with

Furthermore, they specialize in dildoes that are based on the size and shape of varying animal phaluses...

A bit odd, but again, I have no problem with this

They have several sections in their website (for the sake of making it easier to 'browse'), each categorized by differing species and genii of animal...

One of these sections is entitled "Dragons and Griffons"...

It is at THIS point I start to have a problem

How on earth could a manufacturer which claims to produce "genuine realistic animal phallus-shaped dildoes" produce a dildo based on the shape of a phallus of a creature...

Which NEVER EXISTED?

Oh, how I wish I didn't know the answer to that question.

According to the website itself, said phaluses were designed based on reasearch...

"Of dozens of artist's renderings"!

It was at this point that I began to openly weep

weird_guy_in_the_corner · Vociferator Joined: 14 Oct 2004 Posts: 708

Those are some ugly penises.

SquareMoogle · Vociferator Joined: 16 Dec 2004 Posts: 357

Uh, if that made you cry then I assume you didn't see the "animal mating page" on the site. :D

AngryPuritan · Needs to get out more Joined: 15 Jan 2005 Posts: 1361

Uh, if that made you cry then I assume you didn't see the "animal mating page" on the site. :D

Or the images of many satisfied customers...

Captain Cowgirl · Needs to get out more Joined: 27 May 2005 Posts: 1091

Uh, if that made you cry then I assume you didn't see the "animal mating page" on the site. :D

Or the images of many satisfied customers...

They actually have pictures of customers?
There's also a Zeta Creations LJ CUMMunity (LOLZ)...a bunch of gay babyfurs talking about how theyre 'having a hard time taking in the knot'.

Beauty of Nature · Prattler Joined: 29 May 2005 Posts: 178

Dormin · Qualificator Joined: 01 Nov 2004 Posts: 29

They actually have pictures of customers?
There's also a Zeta Creations LJ CUMMunity (LOLZ)...a bunch of gay babyfurs talking about how theyre 'having a hard time taking in the knot'.

Yep, mainly of them 'enjoying' the products.

WARNING, THE FOLLOWING SHIT IS NOT SAFE FOR WORK.

Bugfuck Jesus

I'm just going to provide the link to the page with the satisfied customers that has the links to the sections featuring either male or female users 'enjoying' the products near the bottom of the page*.

Funny thing is, there is only four pics in the women's section, but there is two pages of pics in the males section.

*I'm not sure if it breaks TOS, and frankly I'm not risking it.

baserock love · Vociferator Joined: 04 Dec 2004 Posts: 685

Bugfuck Jesus

No way i'm clicking on those pictures but i thought this was worthy of a mention in the AA.

Recieved "smokey" the new bear dildo from "Zetacreations" today. and it is quite fun to use. check out what it looks like,when mounted to a plush bear :o)

Didn't look at that either :lol:

They've stood up over a year of usage

Wasn't that guy a furry artist once? Either way he sounds surprised that he's having trouble wearing out a dildo :? Is that even possible? That thing is probably more lethal than a small nuke.

Monkey King · Vociferator Joined: 16 Jun 2005 Posts: 459

It would be funny to give someone the dolphin or kangaroo dildo as a housewarming present and convince them it's an abstract sculpture.

AlbinoHagfish · Prattler Joined: 31 Jul 2005 Posts: 199

Ahaha. Totally co-incidental, but when I clicked on the link for user pics I got the "Firefox has encountered a problem and needs to close" message.

Troggler · Venter Joined: 28 Jul 2005 Posts: 246

Your browser, in a moment of unparalleled heroism, commited suicide rather then put a bunch of sated animal dildo users on your monitor. NEVAR 4GET!!1

Stoneth · Needs to get out more Joined: 01 Dec 2004 Posts: 1225

They've stood up over a year of usage

Wasn't that guy a furry artist once? Either way he sounds surprised that he's having trouble wearing out a dildo :? Is that even possible? That thing is probably more lethal than a small nuke.

A furry artist? Not really, I've seen more artwork made for him than art he produces himself. He runs Furcen.org. He's also my webspace host.

m_estrugo · Vociferator Joined: 13 Nov 2003 Posts: 534

"Firefox has encountered <s>something horrendous</s> a problem and <s>implores you to not visit this site anymore</s>needs to close" message.

AngryPuritan · Needs to get out more Joined: 15 Jan 2005 Posts: 1361

How can a dildo be WORN OUT? How often must one use it to physically ruin it? Would not your anus typically get worn out first?

It would be funny to give someone the dolphin or kangaroo dildo as a housewarming present and convince them it's an abstract sculpture.

The perfect gift for post modern pansies, or furries, or postvixen.

Captain Cowgirl · Needs to get out more Joined: 27 May 2005 Posts: 1091

How can a dildo be WORN OUT? How often must one use it to physically ruin it? Would not your anus typically get worn out first?

It would be funny to give someone the dolphin or kangaroo dildo as a housewarming present and convince them it's an abstract sculpture.

The perfect gift for post modern pansies, or furries, or postvixen.

That'd look kick-ass on the mantle with that XXX Gadget sculpture.

SkunkDogFromSpace · Venter Joined: 05 Jun 2005 Posts: 222

How on earth could a manufacturer which claims to produce "genuine realistic animal phallus-shaped dildoes" produce a dildo based on the shape of a phallus of a creature...

Which NEVER EXISTED?

Dragons and griffons DO exist you blinded fool D: every furry knows that! OMG FURSECUTION!!!!111

I purchased Kit Fox recently. I would just like to say, it is great. It gets used daily. It is so realistic feeling.

"realistic feeling" O_O!!!!
"REALISTIC FEELING"?!?!?!?!!?!?!!
Does that mean he have tried REAL one? WTF???

That'd look kick-ass on the mantle with that XXX Gadget sculpture.

ROLFCOPTER! xD

RailFoxen · Vociferator Joined: 01 Jan 2005 Posts: 625

Gargargarwhatever the funny shit is right here, people.

I'm Icey Kitsune and I have 4 zeta toys right now (roys toy, gryphon, grand pup and knight rider), hoping to get more toys as soon as I get a job and stuff. I really like zeta and have only one other toy that isn’t from them but their toys get used nightly. ^.^

ROLFCOPTER! xD

Are you certain you haven't choked on your tongue and drowned in your own saliva yet?

IceCat · Venter Joined: 31 Oct 2003 Posts: 244

Anthro Tiger toy, it's only $50, and it looks like something left over from a all-you-can-gag shit buffet. NSFW!

baserock love · Vociferator Joined: 04 Dec 2004 Posts: 685

Anthro Tiger toy, it's only $50, and it looks like something left over from a all-you-can-gag shit buffet. NSFW!

It looks delicious, like freshly pulled peppermint taffy, too bad it's in the shape of a tigers dick. One of the guys at the forum mentioned that he enjoyed "busting an O ring on it" :x . Some sexual inuendos are just too disgusting, that's right up there with "bumping uglies" and "meat slapping"

SkunkDogFromSpace · Venter Joined: 05 Jun 2005 Posts: 222

Are you certain you haven't choked on your tongue and drowned in your own saliva yet?

Hmmm.. lemme check.
...
Nope. i haven't :D
Yay?

Donotsue · Needs to get out more Joined: 17 Jan 2004 Posts: 884

Oh I see our Iceykitsune -the plushie-birther- is also on the Zeta board!

Captious Tyro · Rasophore Joined: 06 Aug 2005 Posts: 51

I think people are missing the ultimate furry sex toy but I've found a link.
http://www.digitaltigers.com/tigervista-arenaelite.shtml
The addy is a bonus point.