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As the Fur Flies
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Joined: 17 Jun 2004
Posts: 1

Posted: 6/27/2004 10:48:20 PM     Post subject: As the Fur Flies  

Ahhh, one of, if not THE first post to CrushYiffdestroy. I feel honored. *chuckle* I love this place, for the humorvalue it lends to the furry fandumb. And, with that, I feel like throwing out my own!

Following is a little something I came up with. It's the teaserscript for a soapopera, titled "As the Fur Flies". These postings will be actual discussions that I've been involved with, on assorted furry MUCKS. Granted, they are heavily edited, and changed to fit the general idea of a mid-day soap. Hope ya'll enjoy, and let me know if you want more!

(Cue opening shot of Maral, a middle-aged raccoon, standing in front of a desk, ranting, screaming, and slamming things at a faceless paperpusher)

Maral: Listen you, you do NOT understand. I NEED that housing allowance. I'm disabled!
Paperpusher: Well, Mr. Maral, we seem to have lost the paperwork for your allowance. Please tell me what it is that has caused your disability.

(Cue Maral slamming a paperweight on the desk)

Maral: I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, you moron, isn't it obvious!

(fade to black)

(Cue thememusic for "As the Fur Flies". Audiovent, The Energy. Along with, montage still-frames of furs engaging in overly dramatic discussions)

(Cue back from commerical. Maral, Kirim, and Jene are sitting around a table at the local pub. Maral is quite agitated, still slamming things, and acting like a complete git)

Maral: Listen you guys, my life is going down the drain. They lost the paperwork proving I was disabled, and I'm not going to get my rent paid for!
Kirim: Wow man, that sucks. Gods I hate those paperpushing morons.
Jene: Wow. What exactly is your disability, Maral?

(Cue Maral jumping out of chair, leaning over, shoving finger in Jene's face)

Maral: I've got chronic Fatigue Syndrome, you idiot! Not only that, the place where I ordered the cable to hook up my plasma screen TV to my computer sent the wrong thing. My life is ruined!
Kirim: Yeah well, maybe you can sue them both!
Jene: Well, that does suck, Maral. What are you doing to get treatment for this problem. I've heard that physical activity can do loads to help chronic fatigue sufferers.

(Again cue Maral, getting quite worked up, slamming his beer down)

Maral: Listen, stop telling me to do things that go against common sense, and what Dr. Quackenbush tells me to do!
Kirim: Yeah, Jene, are you some kinda doctor or something.
Jene: No, but I am in training to be a Registered Nurse. I've watched treatment for CFS sufferers, and lots of it has to do with being more active.

(cue Maral frothing at the mouth, glaring and raging at Jene)

Maral: Ok, you are just plain wrong. My doctor has told me I shouldn't do ANYTHING that causes stress. Hell, even walking one hundred feet causes me to loose my breath and pass out.
Jene: Wow, man? Why aren't you in the hospital then, instead of here with us? That sounds awful.
Maral: I'm not going to answer that, you twit. Now, I need to figure out how to sue the Goverment for losing my paperwork.

(Cue Overvoice Narrator, in a deep, dark, resonating voice)

Narrator: Will Maral win his suit against the goverment? Will Jene finish RN school? Will Kirim ever get laid? Tune in next week, to As The Fur Flies!

(Cue fade to black, and the commerical sequence.)
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Josh Z.
Joined: 13 Jun 2004
Posts: 29

Posted: 6/27/2004 11:15:59 PM     Post subject:  

I am repeatedly poking my finger into the computer screen, trying change the channel but IT'S. JUST. NOT. WORKING.
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Joined: 03 Jan 2004
Posts: 488

Posted: 6/28/2004 3:12:25 AM     Post subject:  

...I'm not even supposed to be him today! The boss called. He can't muck, so he asked me to come in.
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Joined: 22 Nov 2003
Posts: 182

Posted: 6/28/2004 4:35:14 AM     Post subject:  

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Joined: 01 Jun 2003
Posts: 349

Posted: 6/28/2004 7:59:08 AM     Post subject:  

oh jesus fucking christ
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