Crush...Yiff...Destroy!

Dr. Mojo · Vociferator Joined: 19 Feb 2005 Posts: 399

http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=3053

:lol: I'm sorry for relaying this here since everybody's probably already seen it, but this Chrono guy is just incredible. Apparently he believes that he channels videogame characters.

21st Century Digital Boy · Venter Joined: 27 Dec 2003 Posts: 202

There's some good snippets in here as well.

My favorite:

I swear my mother is the meanest bitch sometimes. Other times she is nice but she can be just as cruel as she can be a mother. First of all I tell her I am getting offline at 9: 15 PM, since she only gives me an hour online even when we are not receiving phone calls; secondly my sister lies on me and says she did all the chores just as it was months before when she first moved in, when I CONSENTED she move in. She has it made and sits back, laughing while I suffer her, and her nephew to suck money out of us like a nipple.

As I was saying, I was like, "Mother I am banning troublemakers from my website, it will take a little longer. Please underst-" Right before I finished, she stomps back here, with her saggy breasts, dyed hair and wrinkled up face, and veiny arms, and blurts like a spoiled child, "NO, NO, I TOLD YOU TO GET THE HELL OFF THAT FUCKING COMPUTER 5 MINUTES AGO AND I WANT YOU OFF! I DO NOT CARE HOW MANY FUCKING PEOPLE DEPEND ON YOU OR YOUR WEBSITE!"

She does not even realise, no matter how much I say to her, how many people on the internet are good and trustworthy people; I am an adult now, I have common sense and am a trained fighter. Why on earth is someone from the internet going to come after me, and even so, would I not be trained for such?

The "lion" video and it's remix are not to be missed either.

Kadius · Needs to get out more Joined: 10 Feb 2004 Posts: 911

WOOSH WOOSH WOOSH

I AM POWERING UP.

Banrai · Vociferator Joined: 13 Jan 2005 Posts: 560

WHy does the way this person talks about channeling the characters remind me of the 'Therian' community? I SLEEP TO COMMUNICATE WITH MY SPIRIT ANIMAL LOL.

Dr. Mojo · Vociferator Joined: 19 Feb 2005 Posts: 399

I AM A TRAINED FIGHTER. I TRAINED IN THE ASTRAL PLANE WITH GOKU AND SONIC AND CRONO AND CRONO TAUGHT ME TO LUMINAIRE. I JUST HAVE TO FOCUS ON THE POWER OF ALL OF MY FRIENDS ON SPIRA AND TORIL, CUZ THEY'RE THE ONES WHO REALLY LIKE ME.

baserock love · Vociferator Joined: 04 Dec 2004 Posts: 685

That kids parent should take away his computer and videogames. Seriously, that kid is having delusions and needs to be forced to interact with.......npc's, only real ones.

Dr. Mojo · Vociferator Joined: 19 Feb 2005 Posts: 399

However I do remember I tried a dangerous new
transformation; activating the JENOVA cells in
my soul and body. Immediately after this I started
becoming like JENOVA, and insane; but such is
the cost of a high power.

He even mixes in FF7 stuff. It's like trains carrying entire fandoms of people collided on one man-beast.

EDIT: Wow, the lion video. Just...wow. I think the scariest part is that he looks like a relatively normal person. HE WALKS AMONG US. :EEK

EDITAGAIN: GOD DAMNIT DOES HE WATCH THIS STUFF AND THINK "GEE, I' MAWESOME"

Ray Prower · Prattler Joined: 11 Apr 2005 Posts: 166

WOOSH WOOSH WOOSH

I AM POWERING UP.
(Sol Pic)

WHAT.

Also, Mojo. The answer is most likely yes. I mean, if he watched that crap and thought otherwise he probably wouldn't still be behaving that way.

Dogthing · Vociferator Joined: 26 Oct 2003 Posts: 700

I'd really like to meet this guy in real life.

I noticed that he also believes that he is married to a Sonic fanfiction character.

"SHE'S REAL AND I NEED NO OTHER WOMAN HURRRRP where's my cheetos"

Kadius · Needs to get out more Joined: 10 Feb 2004 Posts: 911

Someone needs to do a remix with the theme from the Mortal Kombat movie.

TEST YOUR MIGHT.

Foxid · Venter Joined: 17 Jun 2005 Posts: 298

and am a trained fighter.

You're just jealous 'cos he's been chatting online with babes all day. Besides, you know he's in training to be a cage fighter.

V3Ng3 · Rasophore Joined: 02 May 2005 Posts: 56

The "lion" video and it's remix are not to be missed either.

Can he do lightsaber noises as well?

Monkey King · Vociferator Joined: 16 Jun 2005 Posts: 459

"Mother I am banning troublemakers from my website, it will take a little longer."

I would murder a hundred virgins to hear him say that to his mom in person.

SkunkDogFromSpace · Venter Joined: 05 Jun 2005 Posts: 222

New level of "pathetic" is born!

Dr. Mojo · Vociferator Joined: 19 Feb 2005 Posts: 399

I think his problem comes from having a strictly authoritarian mother who demands respect but doesn't deserve it and it angers him because although he's a TRAINED DRAGONBALL BLACK BELT X-385 FIGHTER he's too much of a pussy to stand up to his mother or siblings.

SLaitila · Vociferator Joined: 03 Jun 2003 Posts: 490

I think I'm getting a mental image of this guy. 17-18 years old, pale as a frozen turkey, glasses, greasy hair cut into line by putting a hockey helmet on his head and clipping along the lines. Bad posture, I say, a fatty with an ass so big it has its own congressman. Pale shorts with chocolate and sperm stains (too much of that SONIC PORN ayie1!), black t-shirt with a goku print on, tennis shoes that use two slips of this attaching fabric instead of laces.* Natural human colon,** mostly used to attract flies instead of women.

At daylight he stares people from his room window, when looked back at, he hisses like a nekowife. Sometimes, in his room, he trains to move an empty pizza box with BI energy, ending up just kicking it and saying to himself

"LEVEL FIVE HOMESTAR KICK BOY KANTORIPA TOYOTA! WHOOSH!"

After that he is interrupted by his mom who kicks his ass, while saying:

"LEVEL FIVE PARENTING YOU FAT RETARDED FUCK!"

In discontent, the boy faps to fchan.

*I seriously don't know, tarralenkkarit in finnish.
**TESTICLE SWEAT

SkunkDogFromSpace · Venter Joined: 05 Jun 2005 Posts: 222

i'm gonna die from laughter.. that's pretty much what i pictured too.. tho not in such detail <_< ugh (lol)
Some people really should stop obsessing over some things.. er.. he even thought he was married to a fictional character.. he was all like "OMFG she exists!111 She will kick your ass with her supa-powars!!111"

Hehe.. puhuva pää xD

Dr. Mojo · Vociferator Joined: 19 Feb 2005 Posts: 399

He videotaped himself doing some ACTION KARATE MOVES and it's linked on the first page of this thread. The "lion" video.

*I seriously don't know, tarralenkkarit in finnish.

Velcro.

Trista · Prattler Joined: 30 May 2005 Posts: 156

:lol: I'm sorry for relaying this here since everybody's probably already seen it, but this Chrono guy is just incredible. Apparently he believes that he channels videogame characters.

I take it you've never heard of otakukin? (shudders)

Kadius · Needs to get out more Joined: 10 Feb 2004 Posts: 911

:lol: I'm sorry for relaying this here since everybody's probably already seen it, but this Chrono guy is just incredible. Apparently he believes that he channels videogame characters.

I take it you've never heard of otakukin? (shudders)

I REFUSE TO BELIEVE THESE PEOPLE EXIST.

Tass · Prattler Joined: 05 Mar 2005 Posts: 178

WOOSH WOOSH WOOSH

I AM POWERING UP.
(Sol Pic)

WHAT.

Also, Mojo. The answer is most likely yes. I mean, if he watched that crap and thought otherwise he probably wouldn't still be behaving that way.

DRAGON INSTALL!

Aside from that, I still think Humankin is the awsomest thing since awsome came to awsome town.
http://www.vex.net/~teleute/HumanKin/HFAQ.html

Zod God · Prattler Joined: 15 Jun 2005 Posts: 105

:lol: I'm sorry for relaying this here since everybody's probably already seen it, but this Chrono guy is just incredible. Apparently he believes that he channels videogame characters.

I take it you've never heard of otakukin? (shudders)

I REFUSE TO BELIEVE THESE PEOPLE EXIST.

They need to be stopped becfore they start having their own cons where they dress up as goku and grunt for hours charging up their KI.

Dr. Dos · Vociferator Joined: 11 Oct 2004 Posts: 718

and rent out space? No way.

They'll just have a monthly con on the astral plane. There will be a tournament and training tips and prizes and games!

21st Century Digital Boy · Venter Joined: 27 Dec 2003 Posts: 202

This topic just reminded me of one of my favorite images ever:

SkunkDogFromSpace · Venter Joined: 05 Jun 2005 Posts: 222

That child in the background looks scared xD

Monkey King · Vociferator Joined: 16 Jun 2005 Posts: 459

If that picture was taken with a wide-angle lens, you'd probably be seeing some frightened adults, too.

Captain Cowgirl · Needs to get out more Joined: 27 May 2005 Posts: 1091

LMFAO BEST PICTURE EVER.

LoKi · Venter Joined: 09 Mar 2005 Posts: 262

Honestly, at least the guy in DBZ get-up is in decent shape.. unlike the "DBZkin" twink...

Computolio · Needs to get out more Joined: 01 Jun 2003 Posts: 865

DEREK RICH: FRIEND TO CHILDREN EVERYWHERE

Dogthing · Vociferator Joined: 26 Oct 2003 Posts: 700

Alright, everybody motherfucking PAUSE.

"Otakukin?"

Someone needs to explain this to me right now. It can't be real.

RailFoxen · Vociferator Joined: 01 Jan 2005 Posts: 625

Y'all get ready for this.

Otakukin were invented to give the last dying, rational parts of the otherkin psyche something to laugh at. This is the stuff psychology finals are made of. This is the mental version of an abandoned decaying copper mine leeching mercury and sulfides into nearby streams. An otakukin's journal is the bright helium flash of a collapsing star, and at its core sits a ball of batshit insanity slowly running down. Otakukin suffer from a simulated version of shell shock. If the world's collections of stuffed animals formed a representitive democracy, otakukin would be its elected leaders.

SkunkDogFromSpace · Venter Joined: 05 Jun 2005 Posts: 222

D:

A new subculture? NOOOoooOOooOOOo!!! *Darth vader scream*

Dr. Mojo · Vociferator Joined: 19 Feb 2005 Posts: 399

Oh, so these are the girls who write fanfictions about killing Kagome and marrying Inuyasha?

creature · Vociferator Joined: 06 Nov 2003 Posts: 520

And worse. These are the girls the want to be teamed up on by every male on Inuyasha.

Foxid · Venter Joined: 17 Jun 2005 Posts: 298

And worse. These are the girls the want to be teamed up on by every male on Inuyasha.

I thought these were the girls who want to bone Inuyasha because they believe they are the reincarnation of Kagome?

V3Ng3 · Rasophore Joined: 02 May 2005 Posts: 56

I'm not hip on all the anime stuff, but that... thats a girl, right? Right?

RailFoxen · Vociferator Joined: 01 Jan 2005 Posts: 625

...when the women were real women, the men were too...

Foxid has it right. They've crossed the line between imagining and believing. Like otherkin, only they have spirits of copyrighted characters. (That'd be an amusing DMCA case.) What I haven't yet seen is the reaction between two who are the reborn spirits of the same character...

EDIT: After flipping through a few communities, it seems a close majority are 'generic anime', and a lot of 'em just have copyrighted spirit guides. (Who they knew before the movie/game came out, natch.) And surprise, many are self diagnosed fucks using Asperger's as a crutch.

EDIT2: I had a Hunter spirit long before Marathon.

Dr. Mojo · Vociferator Joined: 19 Feb 2005 Posts: 399

Oh, I can rationalize that. See, we're all actually reincarnations of the same spirit who has split and split again over the courses of time so we're actually all spiritually descended from a slime mould that arose in current-day Hoboken.

creature · Vociferator Joined: 06 Nov 2003 Posts: 520

I'm not hip on all the anime stuff, but that... thats a girl, right? Right?

Nope. It's a MAN, BABY!

Trista · Prattler Joined: 30 May 2005 Posts: 156

I'm not hip on all the anime stuff, but that... thats a girl, right? Right?

He's male...except for when fangirls decide they have Mary Sue characters that look exactly like him like Samurai Kat.

Edited because the scary otakukin links I posted are in this thread already

V3Ng3 · Rasophore Joined: 02 May 2005 Posts: 56

And we ONLY dropped two bombs!?