Crush...Yiff...Destroy!

m_estrugo · Vociferator Joined: 13 Nov 2003 Posts: 534

Damnit, I mean it. When I die, I want to be cremated. To ashes. Tiny ashes.

It's the second time I find this site. It's a site about a certain catacomb in Palermo where bodies are happily exposed on their decaying glory. And, for the second time, I reaffirm my strong wish to be incinerated when I die.

It looks this was an old Palermitan tradition... to dress up the dead ones like they were still alive so they can be visited by their dear ones, after the body has been mummified. And so they had those corpses lined up like a huge collection of natural-sized dolls. But, uh... The mummification process they used wasn't precisely the best ever.

http://members.tripod.com/~Motomom/1.jpg
http://members.tripod.com/~Motomom/Image8.jpg
http://members.tripod.com/~Motomom/Image5.jpg
http://members.tripod.com/~Motomom/RED-HAIREDYOUTH.JPG

Damn, spare this body to decay this way. I want to be cremated. For good. Or at least let the worms eat my flesh. Or something. I'm gonna have nightmares. Aiiiieeeee.

ZenZhu · TOP POSTER! Joined: 22 Mar 2004 Posts: 1510

I've always figured on being cremated. I just can't see a dead body sitting in a hole in the ground in a coffin costing a few thousand dollars with a headstone costing a few hundred while there are living people sleeping in cardboard boxes. Why take up useable property and suck money out of our family when you're then simply an inanimate collection of raw materials? Just douse me in gas, light a match, and then throw the ashes in the face of someone I didn't like and tell them "Zen says, 'Hi.'"

Skunkfuckers Inc. · Needs to get out more Joined: 20 Jan 2004 Posts: 1006

What Zen Zhu said.

Also

Rankin · TOP POSTER! Joined: 03 Jan 2004 Posts: 1659

Twenty, Twenty, Twenty more degrees to go, I wanna be cremated.

Dr. Dos · Vociferator Joined: 11 Oct 2004 Posts: 718

glad I'm not the only one who was thinking of the Ramones when I saw the topic title.

The New Meat · Needs to get out more Joined: 03 Jun 2003 Posts: 933

I want my body to be shot into space in a rocket. In a rocket made of SOLID GOLD!!!

Dogthing · Vociferator Joined: 26 Oct 2003 Posts: 700

I want a combination burial-at-sea and cremation. Yes, that's right, I want a viking funeral. I want a small, traditionally-built longboat to be loaded with most of my belongings, then my corpse, and then set afloat and set on fire. It would be glorious I tell you, glorious.

Besides, I'd rather go to Valhalla than heaven. Heaven's full of preachy angels and I'd have to spend an eternity listening to them, whereas Valhalla's full of cool-ass vikings and I'd be hangin' with them all day swigging mead and ravishing dead barmaids.

Rural Pimp · Rasophore Joined: 25 Dec 2004 Posts: 70

Besides, I'd rather go to Valhalla than heaven. Heaven's full of preachy angels and I'd have to spend an eternity listening to them, whereas Valhalla's full of cool-ass vikings and I'd be hangin' with them all day swigging mead and ravishing dead barmaids.

Sorry Dogthing, Valhalla is warriors-only. Warriors fallen on the field of battle, that is.

Rankin · TOP POSTER! Joined: 03 Jan 2004 Posts: 1659

Sorry Dogthing, Valhalla is warriors-only. Warriors fallen on the field of battle, that is.

He's fat and smells bad - that has to be good for something, right?

Rural Pimp · Rasophore Joined: 25 Dec 2004 Posts: 70

He's fat and smells bad - that has to be good for something, right?

Those who die of sickness and old age get to hang out with Hel, godess of the underworld, who is half beautiful woman and half corpse. Hel has a hobby - she builds a ship out of human nails. The ship is called Nagelfare and will set sail at the End Times. If the dead have long, unkempt nails, she will take these and add to her ship.

Being a swede, I learned all that viking stuff in school.

ZenZhu · TOP POSTER! Joined: 22 Mar 2004 Posts: 1510

I figure whatever is on the other side is fine.

Heaven? Great.

Valhalla? Fine.

Reincarnation? Great... can I put in an order to come back as a hot Japanese lesbian babe?

Oblivion? Hey.. it's quiet. Rob Dougan's song "Nothing at All" actually makes oblivion sound pretty good.. especially when you're running on very little sleep.... just nice, quiet nothingness.