Crush...Yiff...Destroy!

Skunkfuckers Inc. · Needs to get out more Joined: 20 Jan 2004 Posts: 1006

In case anyone here still hasn't noticed or heard, one of our most prolific members on these forums will be leaving us soon; after his 1,500th post, Zen Zhu will no longer be an active member here.

At first he'd made it sound like such a far off point in time, but I don't think even he realised just how often he was posting. Even my estimates put it at two to four months before his time ran out, and that was a few weeks ago. Now with less than 50 posts left, at this rate he has only about a week to go.

There's a quote from one of my favorite anime series, a scene where a father tells his daughter not to chase the fireflies because they'll be leaving us soon...

Zen Zhu has been our firefly, his posts like living sparks of brilliance that dance in the night. It feels like summer is coming to a close on our little CYD homestead, but, I fear, there will never be a summer like the one we had with you.

Godspeed, Zen Zhu.

Dr. Mojo · Vociferator Joined: 19 Feb 2005 Posts: 399

Why is he doing that? :(

Dogthing · Vociferator Joined: 26 Oct 2003 Posts: 700

But... no. :(

Stay, Zen! STAAAYYYY! :cry:

Stoneth · Needs to get out more Joined: 01 Dec 2004 Posts: 1225

An ode to ZenZhu, by Stoneth.

Your posts were like the glistens,
When the sun hits Cocirolca.
You know your stuff both in and out,
Like a German knows how to Polka.

The thought of you leaving at post 1500,
Is a thought I can't stand in the least.
Crush...Yiff...Destroy without ZenZhu?
That's like Monty Python without John Cleese.

You writing was deep and I know I will miss,
You participation in this little hoedown.
But I will always think of you,
When I watch The King and I or Xiaolin Showdown.

Paul · Needs to get out more Joined: 01 Feb 2004 Posts: 1092

Why is he doing that? :(

There's only so much serious analysis that can be done of furrydumb. Sooner or later you pretty much have discussed and diagnosed all aspects of it... psychological, (sub)cultural, societal, whatever... and are left with only the atrocity tourism of looking at ugly art or uglier fursuits. Personally, I still find the atrocity tourism highly entertaining, but I don't think ZenZhu does anymore. His is definitely the healthier attitude: leave the trainwreck... stop looking at it. But I'll miss his presence here.

Dr. Dos · Vociferator Joined: 11 Oct 2004 Posts: 718

when he leaves VCL better be filled with quickly drawn tribute art to his legacy.

Donotsue · Needs to get out more Joined: 17 Jan 2004 Posts: 884

He's the sober Yin to our raging Yang! <=)

Too bad if you manage to tear yerself away... but drop in sometimes if ya see a worthy thread! =(

Use the free time wisely and collect all yer stuff and write a book on furdom... and use our illustrations fur free-OMG! Lawsuite!

I... don't like goodbyes... in my perfect world nothing ever changes...

Rankin · TOP POSTER! Joined: 03 Jan 2004 Posts: 1659

Zen won't leave us. He'll just be around less. Like herpes, after the initial outbreak.

SquareMoogle · Vociferator Joined: 16 Dec 2004 Posts: 357

Zen Zhu has been our firefly, his posts like living sparks of brilliance that dance in the night. It feels like summer is coming to a close on our little CYD homestead, but, I fear, there will never be a summer like the one we had with you.

So like, are you going to have mansex with him now? He owes you a goodbye fuck.
Either way, ZenZhu's fuckin' strong kung-fu will be missed even if he just becomes a semi-lurker.

Quatrewolf · Coadjutor Joined: 05 Jun 2004 Posts: 72

I hope enjoy leaving the shithole that is furry for good. For all the 10 months I been here, I enjoyed all the mature and intellectual comments and posts you made, even the ones that made me look like childish newbie reading your knowledge of the fandom.

Good luck, man. :)

ZenZhu · TOP POSTER! Joined: 22 Mar 2004 Posts: 1510

Christ guys.. I'm not even in the ground yet.

Seriously, the sentiment is appreciated, but I doubt I hardly merit it. My posts are verbose, not really deep. It's armchair psychology, not professional analysis. :) It's all smoke, mirrors, and crackpot theories.

The reason I'm most likely opting to stand down around 1,500 posts is simply because it's time to get on with life. I usually surf CYD while at work during lulls, but sometimes when I should be doing other things, too. Yes, even I, powerful as my kung fu is, can fall victim to the addictive allure of attrocity tourism. It is, admittely, going to be a hard habit to break... trying to do something productive during a lull, rather than letting my fingers creep up to the Google toolbar and type this URL in. But, the stuff I could be doing in my spare work time.. like working on optimizing our website.. will serve my goals a lot more than deconstructing the furry social heirarchy. Sure, they've raped some of my childhood memories. But, that's the past.. time to focus on the present and the future.

Paul's very astute observation is correct. There's only so long you can follow the furries' antics before you realize you're on the sidelines chasing your tail. And then you can only knowingly chase your tail in circles before you get dizzy and fall down. The siren song of the entertainment value they provide is hard to ignore, too. It's not that I've tired of it.. but that I find myself a better and happier person when I'm not paying attention to it. Those minutes of the day I spend looking at and commenting on furry trainwrecks would be better spent simply living my own life and not giving a hoot about the furries.

Ultimately, you have to ask yourself if you're not being dragged down with them in some way. Sure, we sit on the sidelines, but while we're doing that, there's things in our own life we could be enjoying. Basically, there's things I want out of life that aren't served by mocking the furries. And with the exeption of the zoos and pedos... who could be there in greater numbers, exploiting the nature of furrydom but, thankfully aren't... the furries really aren't harming anyone but themselves. Most of them are, in fact, just fanboys that are no different from Trekkies or otaku. Some of them are twisted wastes of flesh, but that just happens with people from time to time. In the end, we get some entertainment out of it, but we're not helping them, and certainly not helping ourselves.

Plus, I've long had a nagging problem between the entertainment I find in mocking furries and Buddhist beliefs. Not to say I'm doomed to be reborn as a cockroach because I made fun of Xydexx or Merlino, but it's not a good thing to do. Nothing is served by it. It's not altruistic tough love dished out in the hopes that some of the furries might realize what asshats they're being (I used to hope that, but long since gave it up). It's just entertainment derived from mocking the foibles of a group of predominantly harmless individuals. So long as I willingly engage in poking fun at a group of individuals for little more than differences on how we choose to see the world or live our lives, my Buddhist practice will be merely superficial. It'd be like preaching nonviolence while kicking a furry in the nuts.

Trainwrecks can be compelling to look at, but if you spend all of your time looking at them, you're missing other stuff you could see. As a young Matthew Broderick once said, "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."

And just remember, fellahs, shadows never completely fade. :)

Besides.. I'm only at 1454. Last Thursday's surpsingly active board put one foot close to the grave, but those 46 remaining posts could last until Friday or they could last until next week.

Dr. Dos · Vociferator Joined: 11 Oct 2004 Posts: 718

your last post better be "oh, by the way I was TDK all along!" or something along those lines.

ZenZhu · TOP POSTER! Joined: 22 Mar 2004 Posts: 1510

In reality, ZenZhu is Lamont Cranston, wealthy young man-about-town.

Gargoyle · Vociferator Joined: 04 Sep 2004 Posts: 455

Most of them are, in fact, just fanboys that are no different from Trekkies or otaku.

Jesus Christ, I know the OTAKU TREKKIES. One of them looks like a stereotypical Trekkie, and the other one like a (Ami)stereotypical Otaku.

Some week ago I actually did a video of these 2 arguing about some stupid shit in the Star Trek FOR HOURS (I filmed a random minute of this), but then some fuckers stole my video camera :( I just reminded myself find someone to lend me one before I go on an anime convention this week (I already missed one last week).

Mastertran · Venter Joined: 07 Oct 2004 Posts: 275

No not Zenzhu!!! Please Zenzhu come back Zenzhu!!!!!!!! Who will defend our site from the horde of Furrydumb?

M0us3_Zero · Vociferator Joined: 22 Mar 2004 Posts: 437

No not Zenzhu!!! Please Zenzhu come back Zenzhu!!!!!!!! Who will defend our site from the horde of Furrydumb?

*stands superheroically* Need a hero? You got one.

Just build a signal of some sort, and I'm at your beck and call. Just point me into the nearest atrocity.

Besides, my trusty sidekick Gollum Aye Aye has ben awfully quiet. I gotta work off his beergut.

Rural Pimp · Rasophore Joined: 25 Dec 2004 Posts: 70

How about compiling and combining all his posts into "The Bible of Zen Zhu"?

Skunkfuckers Inc. · Needs to get out more Joined: 20 Jan 2004 Posts: 1006

Christ guys.. I'm not even in the ground yet.

Seriously, the sentiment is appreciated, but I doubt I hardly merit it. My posts are verbose, not really deep. It's armchair psychology, not professional analysis. :) It's all smoke, mirrors, and crackpot theories.

But we love your crackpot theories :P

Plus, I've long had a nagging problem between the entertainment I find in mocking furries and Buddhist beliefs. Not to say I'm doomed to be reborn as a cockroach because I made fun of Xydexx or Merlino, but it's not a good thing to do. Nothing is served by it. It's not altruistic tough love dished out in the hopes that some of the furries might realize what asshats they're being (I used to hope that, but long since gave it up). It's just entertainment derived from mocking the foibles of a group of predominantly harmless individuals. So long as I willingly engage in poking fun at a group of individuals for little more than differences on how we choose to see the world or live our lives, my Buddhist practice will be merely superficial. It'd be like preaching nonviolence while kicking a furry in the nuts.

This is true, and what I've come to learn in my few years observing this fandom. The fact is, they're actually right when they say that we should just leave them alone and stop bullying them, and that they really aren't doing any damage to anyone but themselves. On the other hand, that doesn't mean that the majority of them aren't still worthless, smelly meat sacks living pathetic, verminous little lives online and off, it just means that there's nothing to save and nothing to gain from acknowledging them, other than cheap entertainment. They really are inconsequential.

Lazarian · Rasophore Joined: 21 Apr 2004 Posts: 60

Maybe we can get Computolio or Mitch to rig his counter to keep it from hitting 1500 posts...

ZenZhu: "Jeez - it's October already and I swore I had more than 1477 posts..."

The New Meat · Needs to get out more Joined: 03 Jun 2003 Posts: 933

Goodbye, ZenZhu, and flights of angels sing thee to thine rest.

ZenZhu · TOP POSTER! Joined: 22 Mar 2004 Posts: 1510

Ah'm not dead yet.

Ah thin' Ah'll go fer a walk.

Ah feel happy! Ah feel happy!

Quantum Coyote · Venter Joined: 12 May 2004 Posts: 221

Out at 1500 eh? conveniant.. <grabs his reincarnation/preincarnation/co-incarnation detector> o.O

edit: yet, I don't wanna be harsh. Your posts will truly be missed, whatever becomes of you. Truly, happy trails to you, ZenZhu.

RailFoxen · Vociferator Joined: 01 Jan 2005 Posts: 625

I rather support the resolution to 'drop in on the weekends, when nothing else is going on'. Perhaps best to save all that impassioned philosophy for a select few posts once a week.

ZenZhu · TOP POSTER! Joined: 22 Mar 2004 Posts: 1510

The only flaw with that notion is that I think I've only ever posted on weekends twice. It could maybe be a Friday "4:05 and my brain is so fried there's no point in doing anything but looking like I'm working until 5:00" kind of thing. Of course, the idea behind it all is to kind of end the frustration of seeing what furries do to themselves.

I stopped giving a flying fuck about the fandom's "image" long ago. Furries will be what furries choose to be. If they can't understand why they're thought of they way they are by now, no amount of bullying, heckling, or ribbing will make a difference. Still, it's kind of hard to watch people do what furries do to themselves. But, if they're happy living with their parents into adulthood or with 7 other furry roommates because they don't want anything more than low-paying stock boy or tech support jobs so that they have plenty of free time to go to cons and such... well... who am I to tell them to not be happy with it? If it's want they want out of life, so be it.

On one hand, it's damned entertaining to watch people build up online relationships and think they've found true love with the big-breasted hermfox they've known on IRC for 3 weeks.. then see their posts as they bawl their eyes out and whine that they'll never love again.. then repeat the process another 5 or 6 times over the next few months. On the other, it's hard watching people do that to themselves. But you can't change 'em. And I think witnessing other people's angst and self-loathing creates stress in the viewer, too, because naturally you wish you could help.

They're entertaining to watch, but annoying, too. The annoyance factor is most easily offset by not entertaining yourself with their misfortunes, either. I guess the easiest way to state my outlook on it is that, though entertaining, furry atrocity tourism isn't doing me any favors. The negative effects of following their exploits are starting to outweigh the positives in my book.

Rather than see an anthro character and know it's only a matter of minutes before they're defiled on someone's oekaki board, I'd rather just let furries fade from memory... focus on the good in my own life, rather than what I perceive as bad in someone else's. As long as they're not hurting animals or children, what consenting adults do in their own lives and bedrooms is really none of my concern. If they want to paste it on the Internet, the easist thing all around is for me to just not look.

Sure, I wish furrydom would have pulled out of the mire. I wish you could surf VCL without seeing man-eating plants digesting Simba look alikes while their penis hovers away. But, it's not gonna happen. I can relive furry atrocities and experience new ones in a kind of self-induced post-traumatic stress disorder, or I can move on.... love my wife, work toward a better job, play my PS2 (Tenchu: Fatal Shadows.. w00t!), become fluent in Japanese and Chinese, travel and see Shinto shrines and the Great Wall, maybe take up kung fu, and just enjoy the good stuff life offers, rather than dwell on the bad.

SLaitila · Vociferator Joined: 03 Jun 2003 Posts: 490

Godspeed, bro'.

Some changes in life are always healthy and, according to those points, I'd say it's one. I quit smoking about three weeks ago and, did just recently realize that it had caused my recent self-destructive depression and over-sensitiveness. Didn't really know an addiction to nicotine can be so strong over someones mind... Odd really. At least I promised I'm never going to quit smoking again, so better not be starting.

It's good to start being a little more productive in life, helping out yer family, yerself, starting a project of some kind, for example recording a REALLY KICKASS demo :P, just being with the world more, being there to see how people and times change, not just in this cryptic internet-world filled with extremes and empty words. Maybe saying hi to a stranger, might never know it is the best person you'll ever meet. Just not being cynical for a while, the net makes people jaded.

About furries, you can't really help them, nor do you want to. They have to help themselves. They have to help themselves hard. They have to take a moment and think, "what made you smile?" Was it a picture of a cute baby animal on the internet, was it a piece of art? And most of all, is it real? Could you touch it or was it just yer cold monitor screen? What did you do after you saw it, saved, forgot and moved on to the irc/livejournal-drama? Was it really worth the ten seconds you lost? Many don't understand how precious life is, how full of opportunities it is. They just see a foggy image of themselves on the mirror, i ain't hip. Keep thinking that and you might actually believe it. Have some coffee, just don't have it at home. Watch how people interact, how they look at each other, you might actually learn something new.

Hell, if I'd get myself to follow these simple rules I'd already rock. I always wanted to rock, and hard. When I grab the bass I'm fucking flying. When I open my throat to spit out the words, my words to the mic, it's space travel. I'd just have to be more social. Not only on the friday's sideways.

Ha! I made a bloody long post you unique little snowflakes!
And Zen, yer armchair psychology rocked. I vote for making a bible of those posts. A bible of common sense.

mouse · Needs to get out more Joined: 13 Jul 2003 Posts: 1192

I quit smoking about three weeks ago and, did just recently realize that it had caused my recent self-destructive depression and over-sensitiveness. Didn't really know an addiction to nicotine can be so strong over someones mind... Odd really. At least I promised I'm never going to quit smoking again, so better not be starting.

Yeah i just quit smoking from 1-2 packs a day over the past 7 years cold turkey 2 weeks ago just for the hell of it. Altho for me its not really intended to be permanent. Im just not allowing myself to smoke anything at all until I no longer have any actual craving to do so. Basically I wanted to be able to do something on my own terms rather than simply being addicted.

Ill probably start laying off the booze too ... again at least for a while.

I want to improve my health in general seeing as I feel like shit half the time these days.

SLaitila · Vociferator Joined: 03 Jun 2003 Posts: 490

Yeah i just quit smoking from 1-2 packs a day over the past 7 years cold turkey 2 weeks ago just for the hell of it. Altho for me its not really intended to be permanent. Im just not allowing myself to smoke anything at all until I no longer have any actual craving to do so. Basically I wanted to be able to do something on my own terms rather than simply being addicted.

Quitting smoking was part one of my plan to get to feel better, in general. The other is to learn how to interact with people again. I've been napping this day and sitting my ass off at the fucking computer again. Mixing the kickass demo, of course, but mainly reading shit from Something Awful, and watching anime. That ain't very social. Then I'll go on with this crap the whole week, then at the weekend getting completely thrashed just talking about shit that pisses me off and guffing large amounts of beer. Next being hung over for two days watching anime thus *sigh* the circle starts again.

Gotta just give myself a little time to change. It's not that I'm a loner with nothing to do, I have loads of friends, but it seems as I'm laying so much time to waste. Time just goes by. Next tuesday I'm gonna be 23 and I still can remember my 19th birthday like it was yesterday.

ZenZhu · TOP POSTER! Joined: 22 Mar 2004 Posts: 1510

I figured I'd put my last post here so it doesn't seem like it's some big zOMG LOOK AT ME I'M LEAVING kind of thing. I didn't figure there was any point in making it its own thread.

After the fun that's been had here, it's hard not to wax poetic a little, even though I only "Internet know" you folks. It's been a lot of fun. The furries are definitely a source of entertainment, but don't let them drag you down with them. Atrocity tourism can be kind of addicting, especially sitting in an office at a job you're not fond of. :) If I remember correctly, I initially came here after looking for a place to discuss how bad Brother Bear was and how much I figured the furries would eat it up. Since then, CYD has become a cross between highly entertaining and habit. It's not a bad habit, but it's not a good one, either. I think it's time to break that habit. My wife's father has been diagnosed with lung cancer. She's about to finish her thesis. It's time to move on to the next chapter in life and focus on the here and now around me, rather than angsting over the misspent days of my furry youth or what some guy in cat ears and a diaper is doing this moment in California.

I'm not really sure if my furry youth was detrimental to my present, if it had any redeeming aspects, or if it was just "one of those things." Probably the latter. The next stage was zOMG - THESE PEOPLE ARE SICK! That, of course, led to the present.

When it's all said and done, however, there are a lot of normal folks in furrydom that aren't any different than Trekkies or otaku. There's also a lot of complete wastes of protein strands. But, if they're not really harming anyone -- other than maybe themselves -- I guess there's no sense in concerning myself with them. Mocking them doesn't do them any favors. No amount of furry flaming will ever "snap them out of it." Since many furries are already highly insecure, mocking them is really just going to exacerbate their insecurities. If no harm's being done... eh.. live and let live.

The only harm that might come of the atrocity tourism is the kinds of things we subject our psyche to. We're not helping them.. and may even be harming us. None of us are better off knowing some guy stuffed three beanie babies up his butt. Sure, it's comedy gold... but at what cost to us? It's hard to think you might consciously want to see the world through glasses that are a little more rose-tinted than what you're seeing now. After all, that's kind of like actively wanting to be naive.

But, there's also a danger of starting to look at the world through shit-colored glasses. Between the two choices, I'd rather take the one that lets me see a commercial with an anthro character and not think about how some furry is probably seeing it right now and wiggling his piggie toes in glee because he just discoverd the new love of his life... as opposed to seeing furry degredation lurking behind every anthro character. And you know... who really cares if some person decides to fixate on a cartoon animal of no one's getting hurt? The only thing that gets hurt in thinking about it is my view of the world.

So, enjoy yourselves folks. Nothing wrong with riding the "It's a Scary Furry World" ride... but make sure you don't do it so much that it skews your view of the world. Take time to smell the roses and look around you and remind yourself that life is pretty darn good if you let it be. Let yourself reclaim that innocent view of things you had before you knew about diaper furs, cub art, and EbonLupus.

Don't worry about them. Don't let them get you down. Have your fun and enjoy your lives. Live them well.

Happy trails, buckaroos.

Banrai · Vociferator Joined: 13 Jan 2005 Posts: 560

<3 ZenZhu.

AngryPuritan · Needs to get out more Joined: 15 Jan 2005 Posts: 1361

Fine advice there. THere's real wishdom to be had in your posts here, and I can only hope that with you leaving, we'll ride the the right path without our... um... ZenZhu training wheels.

Godspeed, sir.

Skunkfuckers Inc. · Needs to get out more Joined: 20 Jan 2004 Posts: 1006

Happy trails, buckaroos.

But do you really know what you're leaving behind? I mean really, truly?

You'll be leaving behind seeing the above image, and having the thought enter your mind that it looks like someone might have photoshopped the horse to have a glowing cock (and/or other people who might think the same).

Dr. Dos · Vociferator Joined: 11 Oct 2004 Posts: 718

this is me saying goodbye to you (with art theft! LAWSUITE)

AngryPuritan · Needs to get out more Joined: 15 Jan 2005 Posts: 1361

Happy trails, buckaroos.

http://sighost.org/sigs/sunset-horse150.jpg

But do you really know what you're leaving behind? I mean really, truly?

You'll be leaving behind seeing the above image, and having the thought enter your mind that it looks like someone might have photoshopped the horse to have a glowing cock (and/or other people who might think the same).

Must you relate everything to cocks?

Rankin · TOP POSTER! Joined: 03 Jan 2004 Posts: 1659

See ya, Zenny. Take care, and may your blinders show only the way to enlightenment. I hope your next Zen garden is not a litterbox.

Iconoclastic · Vociferator Joined: 08 Mar 2005 Posts: 338

I'm not really sure if my furry youth was detrimental to my present, if it had any redeeming aspects, or if it was just "one of those things." Probably the latter.

I'm thinking really hard on that. It stings a bit....

I look at people around me in real life, and it seems like we've all "wasted" in one way or another: bad choices, bad relationships, bad jobs, wacky beliefs and religion. I agree it all doesn't matter in the end. Happiness isn't about what happened in the past, but how we choose to live now.

MonicaKitty · Vociferator Joined: 24 Feb 2005 Posts: 663

It was wonderful reading your insightful and interesting posts, or rather, articles. =) I've only been here a short while, but I'm going to miss reading those...and your awesome Yul Brenner avatar. =) Good luck!